actually, I'm a sock model
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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