im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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