i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I want to be your penis for a week.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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