Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize