no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.