Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
