i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
can u get pink eye on your cock?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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