You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
