am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
