By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
