We're like a lot better than the average bears
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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