just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
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Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
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The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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