The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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