we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
