Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
