yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
