So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
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