I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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