White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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