It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
