i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
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