K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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