I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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