I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
