I molested 6 butterflies tonight
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's never too late to be topless.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize