I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
