we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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