i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
You left your phone here
Wait...
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