i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
