What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
This is the high leading the old right now
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
