Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize