HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
