if you like me you must not know who I am
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Randomize
