Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
