threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
