she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
He shit in the fireplace
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize