ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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