What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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