The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You can't just leave with hair like that
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
