ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Randomize
