i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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