So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
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