i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
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