i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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