Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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