Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize