Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(904): View more from Florida

Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out

(1-904): View more from Florida

How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?

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(718): View more from New York

One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"

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(210): View more from Texas

She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.

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(313): View more from Michigan

I can get orange kush...

(586): View more from Michigan

GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(916): View more from California

Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room

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(415): View more from California

he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.

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(650): View more from California

So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.

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