Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
