I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
