Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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