so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
